Hugs and Kisses

Do you show affection to your children every day (even several times a day)? And do they do the same to you? It does not have to be public. It may be a little kiss on the cheek before they jump out of the car or a hug the first moment you see them in the morning, but there has to be appropriate physical affection between you every day.

If you have gotten out of the habit or have let the hugs fall by the wayside, start back up. Hugs are important! I am deeply convinced of this. Sometimes as our children get a bit older, they may act “too grown up” to give Mom or Dad a hug, especially in front of someone else. But remember to be tender with your children. It is almost impossible for a child’s heart to stray from you if you show each other appropriate physical affection every day. 

Mothers can tell a lot about how a child is feeling when they offer or withhold affection. If you have a habit of being tender with your children, you can tell immediately if things are not quite right. Sometimes when they are sixteen and they give you a hug that lingers longer than the obligatory, you will know that they need encouraging. Sometimes you can feel the tightness in the shoulders of the child who is upset or quick breaths of the child about to cry. The tender moments you share throughout the day keep you vitally in tune with your loved ones. When the line of tenderness is broken, relationships can pull apart.

Appropriate physical touch between fathers and children is also important though it may be shown in different ways. There is often chasing and wrestling between dads and kids, not to mention contact sports.

Teach your children that kindness, thoughtfulness and tenderness are highly valued and a source of great encouragement to you and the rest of the family. Teach them to hug each other and tell each other that they love each other. This simple training will go a long way in cutting off sibling rivalry.